1. |
Waste
04:15
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Drinking alone again, in the dark
I must have left my light off.
I don’t have two bills to rub together,
and I can’t shake this cough.
No direction, I’m aiming for the floor.
Hit the ground hard enough,
I might get what I’m asking for.
An escape, or a break; maybe a comfortable morning.
I guess I’m making this hard for me, again.
I just wish that you could stay.
I got plenty that I think that we could say.
I’m always stuck in the way.
I swear I’m not a twenty-something waste.
Cleaning up again for your visit, try to hide the empty bottles and dishes.
I’m living in hell and trying to fix myself.
I’m trying to put on a smile for everyone else.
I told myself I’d stop doing this on weekdays,
I’m spending all my money just to get another weak taste.
Stumble up to my room to hide here until the morning.
My cup is overflowing.
Staying up until the suns about to rise.
I hear a voice in my head, saying “just let in the light”.
I just wish that you could stay.
I got plenty that I think that we could say.
I’m always stuck in the way.
I swear I’m not a twenty-something waste.
I feel like I’m going to die here.
I feel like I’m gonna drown.
I feel like I’m gonna die here.
I don’t want to bring you down.
I feel like I’m going to die here.
I feel like I’m gonna drown.
Maybe I deserve to stay someplace where I’m lost and never found.
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2. |
Sidewalk Slammer
03:08
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Saying empty praises in basements while the room around me spins
Wasting time and forgetting names of all the people walking in
Setting myself up for failure, just like I always did
Disappoint and hurt the people closest that want to see me win
I feel that I don’t deserve a call
I’m too gone to save, I only learned to fall
Stop, start seeing all the ways you seem to treat your friends
I’d hate to see where the train wreck ends.
I’m swimming into peril
Can’t see the warning signs
I have to teach myself to treat me right, to live, for life
I feel that I don’t deserve a call
I’m too gone to save, I haven’t learned at all
It’s in my blood to fail and run away
Stop me from believing it
Stop me from believing I can’t change
I’m ashamed to say I put me first
I don’t want to be like this anymore
I feel that I don’t deserve a call
I’m too gone to save, I haven’t learned at all
It’s in my blood to fail and run away
Stop me from believing it
Stop me from believing I can’t change
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3. |
Hallmark
02:37
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Broadway at 3am
You’re acting like we’re friends
But I know you know I've got nowhere to go.
Guess that I thought it would be safe
What I mean is: I never want to see your face.
When I think I could go it alone
I’m just reminded of the body you stole
So tell me, how is this gonna go?
This is the way that I break it all down
Just so I can see things looking up
‘Cause you got everything you wanted
You’re taking everything for granted
It seems like you got all this figured out
Or are you faking that as well?
Another life I lived would show me space
Another way that I could find to give it all away
And I couldn’t figure you out cause I knew from the look that was on your face
You weren’t looking for a yes or no
I just couldn’t get away.
Yeah, you got everything you wanted
You’re taking everything for granted
It seems like you got all this figured out
Or are you faking that as well?
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4. |
Ranma
04:20
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Catch me, I’m barely alive
Wet on the skin with nothing inside
See all the angles on my face
My insides feel so dry
I lied.
Stop me and ask if I’m fine
Yeah, I think I need a break from my mind
I can’t just stimulate this away
It’s been decades, and it hasn’t changed
I lied.
Curious, all in all it’s curious.
All in all, it’s a lie.
Softly, like wind in the night
K-cups and codeine so you can feel right.
She can’t stop staring at your face
Nothing left but a life to waste
It’s fake
Carry the shame and the spite
Your heavyweight shoulders make everything light
This is never getting better
I always say whatever
This is gonna kill me someday.
Why wait?
Curious, all in all it’s curious.
All in all, it’s a lie.
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5. |
Buds For Life
04:17
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I wanna find a way to navigate
It all just seems so simple; it all leads to me.
I swear it only takes me half an hour
To get to where you are
I’m not that far
It’s easy, it’s a straight shot up route 3
Screaming every word from every song when we were younger
Drinking myself blind, cause I thought we had each other
Wish I had known that things weren’t gonna last
Maybe I’d’ve taken a few steps back
I can’t blame you, when I’m the one who left.
I know it seems a little out of place
Most of the time I’m trying to save face
I don’t call you, you don’t call me, and this is how it’s been, always
It’s never quite the time or place
To ask if you have been okay
To ask how you’ve been keeping busy
Or how you like to waste your day
I know I don’t always make sense
But this is how the story ends
A tale of everything we felt
A book with all the time we spent
I’ve spent a lot of time with my thoughts
Picking apart what could’ve went wrong
Every string I pull at leads to me
I wish I could show you all what I meant
When I apologized for everything
I could’ve done better. I should’ve done better. I wanna do better.
I was everything but a good friend.
I never thought it’d be this way
I remember every day
Where we would find ways to keep busy
Just explore to waste the day
I know I didn’t make much sense
This isn’t how I thought it’d end
Stumble through a foggy haze
To find I’ve lost all of my friends
Maybe you could see I’ve changed
Well, I admit to changing.
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