Monarch

from Breath in Passing by Toluca Lake

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In memory of Zack

lyrics

I spent a summer getting worse. I held my mind in my hands, and watched it collapse into the dirt. I expected this to burn, but the light's been getting in the way of my ability to learn to take things slowly.

Did you even see the change in the weather? Did you notice it did not get better for me? I wish I took away any opportunity for you to end up six feet deep.

And I know that everything will evaporate ("bitter's no excuse to get better, I'm not better"), but you seemed like a constant that didn't want to waste away (better's no excuse to be bitter -- you're not better). I have done nothing but let you down.

Did you even see the change in the weather? Did you notice it did not get better for me? I wish I took away any opportunity for you to end up six feet deep.

I've been having the same dream where I hear you crying out, and I wade through these rooms to see if you can see me now. There's no good resolution. I can't escape the sound when they said to me that you're not home, and you won't be around.

Had you seen the weather change (we failed too soon)? The air, it felt warmer, but the sun still felt stained to me. I got a chill and felt myself freezing (we failed too soon) when they lowered you down; still and not breathing.

You're gone.

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from Breath in Passing, released July 12, 2018

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Toluca Lake Lowell, Massachusetts

Boston, MA nb fronted 3 piece

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